Friday, 12 February 2010

Dream Log

Its been over a year since I last published a blog, it just lies there in my drafts, forgotten.
Well, been having a couple of strange nights, coupled with the anxiety of this stupid college, the cold shouldering/vibes from friends thats beginning to freeze me inside out and the reminders of peoples' deaths swirling through my sub conscious and making it impossible to dream a li'l dream. :(
Dream 1.
A man, sad and lonely, walking along the beach. The beach reminds him of someone, of something he's lost. I dont know what, but i can feel his sorrow, he's grieving. He's sad. The feeling is so strong like only a dream can make it, so real you can breathe it and so scary that you'd die...
As he's walking along, he comes to this shady place where there's a crab-monster. He cuts off the crab monster's head and puts it on as a mask, to cover his sorrow and goes home. Ther's a birthday party for a child going on at home. The child's happy, until the man enters with the Crab-Monster head mask. It's a funny mask, it's supposed to make her laugh. She's supposed to think it's funny. She starts crying, she can feel what I felt. The man's sorrow, cutting through the crab monster head...making her cry in her heart, she feels his sorrow. She cries tears of blood. And it is so vivid, I can see the tears flow down her eyes, down her cheek, on to th lapel of her shirt. Stained Red.
He pulls off the head of the crab monster, he's crying too. Tears of Blood. down his cheeks, down his shirt.
A woman walks in, starts shouting at the Man. Everyone's watchng the drama. She's screaming at him, telling him that he has no right to ruin the child's life and that "she" had died over 2 years ago and sorrowing does not help him or her or anyone anymore and that he had better jus walk out of their life.
I dont know anyone in this dream. But I felt all of it, and I couldn't smile the following day and I couldn't sleep the following night.

Then there were other dreams too, making it so that I am scared to sleep right now, for fear of dreaming about more death, more blood, more sorrow, more fears.